My Mother

So, don't get me wrong, I love my mother especially watching what she has endured losing my dad. However, what I don't get is how one minute she tells me things my grandmother says that hurts her feelings and in the next breath do the same thing to me! GRRRRR!!! Please don't let me make my boys feel bad about the things they do when they are older. If it's not the way I would do it, it doesn't make it wrong...I mean usually my way is the right way, but they have to learn some how.